The Gift of Singleness
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This past week we talked about singleness. Are you single? What's your attitude towards it? What does Scripture have to say about being single? The world constantly seems to pressure us to find that someone but is that a healthy way to approach our singleness?
Christian led the way on the podcast as he is our resident single boi. We wanted to pick his brain on what he has been learning in his singleness as well as some of the things he has been struggling with.
Right off the bat we dived into the misconception of contentment. Many people believe that if they are not content in their singleness, that they are sinning. Which can be sinful of course, but what does it actually mean to be content?
Contentment is not a feeling, contentment is NOT something you find, it is something you live out.
We can be content and still be lonely.
Let's stop and break down the main passage of scripture we anchored to for this topic.
"I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband"
- 1 Corinthians 7: 32-34
Not everyone can live as single, but those who are able should for the glory of God. The “gift” of singleness is not necessarily made clearly known for the rest of a Christian's life. But if you wake up single, use that day for the glory of God in the gift of singleness. God DOES NOT rip us off, both singleness and marriage is a gift and has benefits. Use either one to the glory of God, not to the glory of yourself.
But why would God, if he knows my desires, keep me single when I don't want to be?
This is a frequently asked question that has some validity to it. But we must break it down honestly.
Do we actually have a desire to be in a relationship for God's glory? Or do we want to be in a relationship solely because we don't want to be single anymore.
Let's be honest here. Way too often can we find ourselves justifying going onto that dating app or spending the night at that guy's house because we think once we find that person, somehow our problems start to go away. I remember myself a couple years ago thinking, "I cannot wait to find my person so we can do so much more work for the kingdom". And while I think that is always the goal with relationships, I also think that can be a mask we put over our loneliness.
Way too often do we as single Christians justify our constant desire to go on dates and be seeking out a relationship. We justify it because we think we will find eternal fulfillment in that person.
If we are waiting to be fulfilled by another person instead of Jesus, we will never stop waiting.
Singleness is a gift, and so is marriage. But wanting one or the other more than wanting others to know Christ is not what we were made for.
I think Satan uses insecurity and loneliness to make Christians forget their real purpose in this earth. Which is to make known the name of Jesus.
We are sometimes way too caught up with finding somebody to get on one knee, or for ourselves to get on that knee, that we start to worship that more than Jesus.
Okay okay, I don't want it to come off as if I hate singleness. As we talked about in the podcast, singleness is an AMAZING gift that we should use to intentionally seek the kingdom every day. What I do think is a problem that largely goes unaddressed in young Christian's lives is the priority that is placed on finding a spouse over helping others find Jesus.
The death of a dating relationship should never devastate us more than the death of the lost. The Great Commission does not deal with lonely souls but lost souls:
Main point to get across on this topic:
Sometimes we idolize who we want at our earthly wedding more than getting others invited into the eternal wedding.
What can you intentionally do to use your singleness for the glory of God???
What is my mission???
As always, from all of us at AskUsWhy we pray you continue to learn and grow in the faith. We want to be a resource for all believers to be equipped in any stage of life, and to be able to bring the kingdom of God wherever they go.
Peace and blessings!
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